Curry Club Review #11 – Elachi, Armthorpe, Doncaster. There was a lot of expectation…

This month’s Curry Club outing landed firmly in the category of: not bad, not great, but absolutely reviewable.

The venue itself made a solid first impression. The decor was clean, modern, and welcoming — the kind of place that suggests you’re in for a decent night. And to be fair, parts of it delivered. But as the evening unfolded, it became clear this was going to be a case of missed potential rather than outright failure.

Across the seven-member panel, the scores told a very consistent story.

The Scores

Damon
Menu: 6.5 | Service: 6 | Taste: 7.5 | Drinks: 6.5 | Value: 4.5

Luke
Menu: 5.7 | Service: 6 | Taste: 7 | Drinks: 6.7 | Value: 6.5

Louis
Menu: 6.7 | Service: 5.4 | Taste: 6.5 | Drinks: 7 | Value: 6

Oliver
Menu: 6 | Service: 6 | Taste: 7 | Drinks: 5 | Value: 4

Hamish
Menu: 6.4 | Service: 6.7 | Taste: 7 | Drinks: 6.9 | Value: 6.3

Curt
Menu: 7 | Service: 7.5 | Taste: 8 | Drinks: 4 | Value: 6

Jack
Menu: 5.2 | Service: 7.1 | Taste: 7.5 | Drinks: 5.2 | Value: 5.1

Category Averages

Menu Choice: 6.2
Service: 6.4
Taste: 7.2
Drinks: 5.9
Value for Money: 5.5

Overall Curry Club Score: 6.2 / 10

Breakdown

Food (The Saving Grace)

Let’s not overcomplicate it — the food was good.

An average taste score of 7.2 is solid, and more importantly, consistent. Nobody had a bad meal. Curt pushed things higher with an 8, while both Damon and Jack backed it up with 7.5s. That tells you everything: the kitchen knows what it’s doing.

But here’s the reality — good food alone doesn’t carry a full Curry Club review.

Service (Where It Slipped)

Service came in at 6.4, and that’s generous.

The staff themselves were likeable — funny, engaging, and clearly not the issue on a personal level. But execution? That’s where it fell apart.

“The staff were good, funny and made us all laugh, but the service was slow and the place was empty… we had to ask for the bill twice!”

That’s the problem. When a place isn’t busy, slow service becomes far more noticeable — and far less forgivable.

Drinks (A Weak Link)

This is where things started to drag.

An average of 5.9, with Curt absolutely tanking it at 4, tells you the drinks offering didn’t hit the mark.

“Multiple beers, it’s a shame they were bad beers.”

You don’t need a premium bar setup in a curry house — but you do need reliable, enjoyable drinks. This didn’t quite deliver.

Menu (Safe but Forgettable)

At 6.2, the menu did its job… and nothing more.

There was enough choice to keep everyone satisfied, but nothing stood out as exciting or memorable. No one struggled to order, but no one was raving about the options either.

That’s the definition of a safe menu.

Value for Money (The Real Issue)

This is where the scores drop off.

At 5.5, value was the weakest category — and crucially, this is the one that decides whether people come back.

Damon (4.5) and Oliver (4) were particularly unimpressed, and the sentiment across the table was summed up brutally:

“I saw better value for money in Edlington.”

That’s not just criticism — that’s a warning.

The Awards

🏆 Currier of the Month:

Curt

After a three-way tie, Curt took it — and deservedly so.

Turning up before work, even ahead of a night shift, is peak Curry Club commitment. Add in strong scoring and solid presence, and it’s a proper, earned win.

❌ Curry Cunt of the Month:

Oliver

At this point, it’s becoming tradition.

The feedback was consistent: poor banter, negative energy, and somehow managing to make winning the award feel predictable — which defeats the whole point of it.

Special mentions:

• Luke for excessive moaning
• Damon for “rude and threatening behaviour” and launching a projectile

Standard Curry Club behaviour, really.

Final Verdict

This place sits right in that frustrating middle ground.

• Good food? Yes.
• Likeable staff? Yes.
• Strong overall experience? Not quite.

The slow service, underwhelming drinks, and questionable value stop it from ever getting out of second gear.

“It wasn’t bad, it just wasn’t great.”

That line sums it up perfectly.

And in Curry Club terms, that lands you exactly where you deserve to be:

Curry Club Rating: 6.2 / 10